“We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make a living but not a life. We’ve added years to life, not life to years. ”
-George Carlin

So, what's been going on lately?

Well, I am finally following through with my lifelong dream of being a writer. I started a freelance business (see: details to come later) and have been putting a lot of time into that. Last night I birthed my own Web domain, so that was pretty exciting (and surprisingly didn't hurt that bad). I can't seem to get anybody to hire me with this GOD FORSAKEN economy, so I created my own job. And, I think I'd be a pretty cool boss, so there's always that...

I am in the process of making my last car payment. Again, may not be that exciting for you, but TOTALLY AMAZING for me! I have been paying on the 'ole Clipser for 5 years and now that beat-up piece of shit is all mine! Oh, the Glory!

I discovered Channel 131 and my mind has been blown that I no longer have to go to the theater to see brand-spankin' new amazing (see: embarassing chick flicks) movies; I can watch them from the comfort of my couch, on my flatscreen with my surround sound. HEAVEN!

I've decided that I'm going to take up mountain biking (see: not right now, but in a few months, silly). Wierd, right? We don't even have mountains here, but I like nature and my motorcycle won't off-road, so I'm left with this. Unless I get a 4-Wheeler, which has always been a lifelong dream of mine. Keep your fingers crossed!

Sadly, that's about it.

A Little Sign From Above:

Ok, Ok. Geesh! I get it, God! I'll be a writer!

In my dreams...

Ok, Ok. I know it looks like I haven't been keeping up with my end of the bargain (see: entertaining the three people who actually read this), but I have a good excuse.

See, what happened was I won a few thousand dollars in the lottery. And instead of paying off my bills like any normal person would do, I cashed in the cha-ching and bought myself a ticket to the Bahamas for a week. Just me, unlimited amounts of alcohol, relaxation and a tan. In fact, I just woke up from a nap in which I had the wierdest dream where discovered that I am a compulsive liar. Oh, wait. That wasn't a dream...

So, the real story is somehwat less exciting (see: work-related). I picked up another client to freelance for, so I've been spending my extra time working on some new business ventures. This is AWESOME for me, but for you, probably not so much.

Just so you know, I'm around.

Gifts with no receipts...

It’s been a while, but I’ll give it a try…

Once, a boy gave me a piggy bank full of pennies. 365 pennies. A penny for each day we had spent together. A single cent for each memory we shared.
I spent those pennies like my dying wish, and crashed the piggy bank on a rocky road.

Once, a boy gave me his heart. It wasn’t very big, but it was a tight fit, and I liked how cozy it made me feel. Eventually, his heart grew and grew and there was room for more girls than just me.
I eventually got pushed out of his heart, and fell into a puddle on a rainy day.

Once, a boy gave me a thousand promises and a puzzle to put together a little at a time. The promises made butterflies appear in my stomach- just a couple at first, and then more and more, and more until eventually, a single monarch escaped my icy breath. It wasn’t long before the other butterflies followed suit, and took the promises with them.
It’s been five years and I still haven’t finished the puzzle; I hold onto the last piece just so it’s not over.

I wish I didn’t spend those pennies…

I'm a cheap date.

As I was reviewing (see: stalking) Facebook profiles today, I realized that there are only a handful of non-materialistic girls left out there in this world. Own a Coach purse? You're out. Have jewelry that you can't buy on those turny-things at Kohl's for half-off? You're a gold-digger (hehe). Have now, or ever, considered it your lifelong goal to be a trophy wife? You're done (I mean, if you're life was made into a television show, I'd watch it).

So, I have decided to list why I am not materialistic, superficial, or said gold-digger. This may also mean that I'm a two-bit hillbilly, but I'm OK with that, too. Let me note, however, that these choices are not because I don't have money; I simply don't see the point in wasting it on things that won't matter in five years. Life is about the adventure, the journey. Not about who wore it best, or how much it cost. Let's continue, shall we?

1. I have never taken a ride in a limo. Don't get me wrong, I've been asked by bachelor parties and Nsync one time when I was at the B-Bash (that's a whole different story), but these pristine cheeks have never parked in a limo.


2. I could care less about my cell phone. No, really. I don't have a BlackBerry or iPhone, and I don't want one. I feel like they take away from the quality of life (see: my parents still pay my phone bill so I'll take the free stuff over those $90 a month dealies). I only get a new one when I drop a phone in a toilet or in a snowdrift. Don't laugh. It could happen to you. Seriously.


3. My idea of a good time is cheap beer and karaoke. Oh, and if the beer is really cheap, I need a burrito or something caloric and cheesy at the end of the night (see: to prevent upchucking said cheap beer). Feel free to substitute cheap beer and karaoke with 2-buck-chuck and reality television and I'm still smilin'.


4. The only thing designer I own is the bottle of Armani Code I just bought yesterday. And, in my defense, it took me approximately six years and a college degree to stomach the purchase and not feel guilty about it (see: I spent a half hour in my car afterwards wondering if the smart choice would be to return it).

Here's a little Eye Candy for ya...

I thought you'd like to see what I got for Christmas, so I put it all on. Don't judge me. No, really.