I'm a cheap date.

As I was reviewing (see: stalking) Facebook profiles today, I realized that there are only a handful of non-materialistic girls left out there in this world. Own a Coach purse? You're out. Have jewelry that you can't buy on those turny-things at Kohl's for half-off? You're a gold-digger (hehe). Have now, or ever, considered it your lifelong goal to be a trophy wife? You're done (I mean, if you're life was made into a television show, I'd watch it).

So, I have decided to list why I am not materialistic, superficial, or said gold-digger. This may also mean that I'm a two-bit hillbilly, but I'm OK with that, too. Let me note, however, that these choices are not because I don't have money; I simply don't see the point in wasting it on things that won't matter in five years. Life is about the adventure, the journey. Not about who wore it best, or how much it cost. Let's continue, shall we?

1. I have never taken a ride in a limo. Don't get me wrong, I've been asked by bachelor parties and Nsync one time when I was at the B-Bash (that's a whole different story), but these pristine cheeks have never parked in a limo.


2. I could care less about my cell phone. No, really. I don't have a BlackBerry or iPhone, and I don't want one. I feel like they take away from the quality of life (see: my parents still pay my phone bill so I'll take the free stuff over those $90 a month dealies). I only get a new one when I drop a phone in a toilet or in a snowdrift. Don't laugh. It could happen to you. Seriously.


3. My idea of a good time is cheap beer and karaoke. Oh, and if the beer is really cheap, I need a burrito or something caloric and cheesy at the end of the night (see: to prevent upchucking said cheap beer). Feel free to substitute cheap beer and karaoke with 2-buck-chuck and reality television and I'm still smilin'.


4. The only thing designer I own is the bottle of Armani Code I just bought yesterday. And, in my defense, it took me approximately six years and a college degree to stomach the purchase and not feel guilty about it (see: I spent a half hour in my car afterwards wondering if the smart choice would be to return it).