I had that dream again last night...you know, the one where I'm me, and you're you, but everything else is completely different. We were at my house, but it didn't look like my house. And your girlfriend was there, only it wasn't really her. You told me a secret, a seven-word sentence that you had been hiding in your heart for the past ten years.

Your secret changed me; I could instantly see it in my face, and feel it deep within my soul. It was like being trapped in a dungeon for thousands of years, only to discover that the key was in your pocket the whole time. It was like being deaf your entire life, and then, in your final moments, being able to hear an angel whisper.

I have played the moment over and over in my head like a Michael Jackson record. I fast forward through the boring stuff, and pause it for the good part. It's what I always wanted to hear, and the way it always should have turned out.

"Why are you acting so wierd?"
"Do you want to know? Do you really want to know?"
"Yes. Tell me. I'm dying to know why you've turned into such a jerk!"
"Because I'm still in love with you!"

A tear escaped from your eye, and a gasp was released from my breath...

"But...but for how long, or have you never stoppe..."

My alarm clock jolts me back into reality.
I guess there are some questions I'll never know the answer to, some dreams that will only ever take life in my heart...

Just me and the open road...

When I'm on the back of my bike, nothing else matters. My problems, worries, incompetencies...they just simply do not exist. My autonomy is my only companion, and my heart is my only instinct. There are no distractions or detours, not when you don't have a planned route. The pavement passes under my feet and retreats behind me, into where I've just come from, to where I'll never return. Time has no meaning when no one's paying attention. I'm out for the ride, for the rush, for the greatest pleasure I have ever known- life.

Gifts with no receipts...

It’s been a while, but I’ll give it a try…

Once, a boy gave me a piggy bank full of pennies. 365 pennies. A penny for each day we had spent together. A single cent for each memory we shared.
I spent those pennies like my dying wish, and crashed the piggy bank on a rocky road.

Once, a boy gave me his heart. It wasn’t very big, but it was a tight fit, and I liked how cozy it made me feel. Eventually, his heart grew and grew and there was room for more girls than just me.
I eventually got pushed out of his heart, and fell into a puddle on a rainy day.

Once, a boy gave me a thousand promises and a puzzle to put together a little at a time. The promises made butterflies appear in my stomach- just a couple at first, and then more and more, and more until eventually, a single monarch escaped my icy breath. It wasn’t long before the other butterflies followed suit, and took the promises with them.
It’s been five years and I still haven’t finished the puzzle; I hold onto the last piece just so it’s not over.

I wish I didn’t spend those pennies…